Transitional Characters Succeed (W02)
Marriage greatly affects society and
families. Data shows that two people who have a healthy marriage and who don’t
follow the trends society has created, such as: cohabiting, single parenting,
etc., have a much healthier family unit within the children and parent
relationships.
Although all families try to make the best
of their situation with what they have, children in families with a single
mother or father, or a step-parent are much more prone to mental health
illness, abuse, suicide and many more problems than children in a family with
their biological mother and father. Children who grow up in a household with
two married biological parents are more likely to be successful in school and have
less problems as children and adults. However, children who are raised in a
household without married biological parents, can still be successful and do
well in life.
C. Broderick talks about transitional
characters. He stated, “A transitional character is one who, in a single
generation, changes the entire course of a lineage. The changes might be for
good or ill, but the most noteworthy examples are those individuals who grow up
in an abusive, emotionally destructive environment and who somehow find a way
to metabolize the poison and refuse to pass it on to their children. They break
the mold. They refute the observation that abused children become abusive
parents, that the children of alcoholics become alcoholic adults, that ‘the
sins of the fathers are visited upon the heads of the children to the third and
fourth generation.’ Their contribution to humanity is to filter the destructiveness
out of their own lineage so that the generations downstream will have a
supportive foundation upon which to build productive lives.” (Broderick, C.
(1992), Marriage and the Family. (p. 18) New Jersey: Prentice-Hall)
He says that if we are willing to change
our ways and choose to be different than how we are raised, then we will be
able to break continuing cycles in our families. This brings me great comfort
because I came from a family with a line of divorce and I have always been
worried that I will fall into the same path. It is good to know that if I want
my marriage to work out, I can break bad habits and have a successful marriage
and family.
There are instances, however, when divorce
is necessary. If a spouse repeats intolerable actions without any desire to
stop, such as abuse, it may be necessary that a divorce takes place. If you are
faithful, loyal and want the best for your family, Heavenly Father will help
you make the best decision for your family and help you to figure out how to
make the best out of what you have.
It is important to be aware of the
decisions we make as young people. We need to try and have a larger view of how
our decisions will affect our future families and how they develop. However, it
is important that we make these choices concerning relationships and families through
the inspiration of the Lord because He will always lead us in the right
direction. He knows the plan and exactly how it’s supposed to work out.
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